Every year for the holidays, when I was little, we would make the long trek from Maryland to Michigan to visit my grandparents. My Grandfather Ben Zendel had a riddle that he loved to tell:
Why does a dog wag its tail?
The answer was:
Because the tail can't wag the dog.
In some ways I feel like that is the current state of parenting in this country. It's out of balance and does not make sense.
A perfect example is the commercial for paper towels that I saw on TV recently. A five year old boy makes a huge mess in the kitchen. It's like a bloodbath with kool aid and cereal. The narrator explains that mom has the super duper extra strong absorbent paper towels so she can easily and happily clean up the mess. Mom is smiling. The little boy is smiling. I would not be smiling. I would have worn out the kid's bottom and then made him clean up the mess!
5 years ago
I'm all for making the kid take responsibility for his own actions. But, does the "middle way" really encompass spanking? Corporal punishment seems to be an extreme, not in the middle.
ReplyDeleteInteresting thought, The Proper Proofreader. I did earn a spanking or two when I was a child, but I was more upset when my dad said "I'm very disappointed in you." For me, that was far more likely to cause me to change my behavior but I imagine it varies with every child. Some kids probably need the spanking to learn the lesson.
ReplyDeleteIn this case, though, was the kid being bad? Or was he trying to be a "big boy" and get something in the kitchen. Can you fault the child for trying to be independent? Maybe the mother in the commercial should have had the child clean up his mess so he could take responsibility for his mistakes.
Just the thoughts of someone coming from only the "kid" side of the scenario. No parenting experience yet!
Thanks for the comments! I believe that spanking has a place in parenting for very young children who do not understand the seriousness of certain situations. An example is the three year old who runs out into traffic. I spanked my children a few times, but by the time children are 4 or 5 there are much better ways of disciplining them.
ReplyDeleteMy mom spanked me just once when I was a child, and, rather than crying or fighting back, she said the way I looked at her was with complete shock, as if to say, "What the heck did you do that for, Mom?"
ReplyDelete